Friday, November 13, 2015

Just Stuff

Crazy times once again.

Wearing a tight pencil skirt and heels in Wally World = evasive maneuvering game with creeper = I win. You know how it is... you're rocking life, strutting your stuff, picking up forks and plates on lunch break for cake, smiling at people and them smiling back just because you've got it going on that day and then... WHAM! Somebody's gotta slow your roll and freak you the hell out. It wasn't one of those times when you know someone looks at you or you look at them and think - wow, God turned you into a masterpiece and I can appreciate that. This dude was the totally creepy, I'm going to throw you in my trunk wrapped in plastic bubble wrap and duct tape, give you the heebie geebie goose bump gotta go shave your legs again and puke kind of guy. He was standing around every corner I turned, just grinning like the Cheshire Cat. That's ok though... this girl's got some skills once she hits that button for stealth mode.

Enter PSA for the day... Girl's, if you're not wearing control top panty hose... you're just doing it all wrong.

Baby Girl had her first experience with cosmetic surgery yesterday. Since she was my smallest preemie at 2lb 2oz, she was on a C-pap until she could breathe on her own. She went in to what was supposed to be a 4 hr surgery to correct her deviated septum... we knew she would probably need the surgery for a long while now. However, the C-pap had caused more trauma than we knew. The surgery ended up taking 4 hrs longer than expected. The Dr. broke the nasal bones at her forehead and corrected them, he broke another bone that was growing into her sinus cavity and removed it, broke her cheeks bones and corrected them, straightened her septum and used cartilage from her ear to correct the shape of her nose. I am happy to say that my Girl can properly breathe now. The Dr. is thrilled with the results and says she's going to be famous. LOL. Frankly, I'm hoping she looks more like me, now that her bridge is skinnier, than her Father. She has a long recovery... maybe a year to fully heal... and I just hope her baby step-sister doesn't hit her in the face.

I started working on my next big stitch. No pictures of it as of yet. But, I have finished a few little ornies:

And... Snoopy for my Stud Muffin. (Yup, he's still around.)

Life is good, Peeps!


Monday, October 19, 2015

Another One Down...

Finished another Christmas ornament weekend before last. I think it was the only thing I worked on, well besides laundry... obviously can't go to work naked!

I think it turned out rather cute despite the fact that I closed it up totally crooked. I figured I'm not perfect... a little wonky actually... so I'm not ripping it. My prerogative, right? LOL

Still have yet to buy the material for my next big project. Procrastination at it's best.

Worked on Precious again yesterday. The lug nuts to your car wheels are not supposed to look like this:
Just a little raunchy, right? Had issues knocking the wheel bearings out as they kept coming out in chunks. The fabulous brother of mine is taking them to a shop for me. What would I ever do without him? I don't know where he gets the patience to walk me through this stuff. Free hands on training!

Other than that, I'm keeping the 4-legged foster kids this week. Was out feeding horses at 5:30 this morning and just had to stop. I totally forgot how beautiful the stars are when you can actually see them. The things you miss when living in town and not on the farm.

Hope all is well with everyone wherever you are!


Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Never too early, right?

Hello, beautiful people!

It's never too early or too late for that matter, to stitch Christmas ornaments, right? LOL

I now have 7 of the 12 days of Christmas done. (Not showing you yet, LOL)
AND... I have finished a snow man ornament...

Just kinda cute, yes?!?

Other than that, I have been too lazy to purchase the material for my next big project. I did however, receive a recommendation for a framer in town that will help me find the perfect frame for Van Gogh... yay!

OOOHHHH!!!! I actually went on a first date a couple of weeks ago.  He showed up at least 20 minutes early. I wouldn't have known except that I opened the door for Cricket to potty, no war paint, dripping wet hair and all... and there he sat in his car. Great impression on my part. I do have to give him kudos because he brought me flowers, told me to take my time getting ready, then sat in his car and listened to the ball game. It was pretty fabulous in that we went for pizza and then the park. Does it really get any better than that? Oh, yes it does... the stud muffin doesn't seem to mind my 50 shades of crazy! Just had to share.

On that note... remember that slight madness is a perfectly acceptable method for surviving in life.... just don't be an extremist. Take the time to be silly. Build that pillow fort and snuggle up for a movie. And above all else... don't forget to color outside the lines once in a while!


Monday, September 28, 2015

I won!!!

Seriously, I almost cried. Almost. LOL.
4yrs, 7 highlighters, 121 colors and 87,400 stitches and 3 needles.
Starry Night.

Sorry the photo is not very good. It's rainy and overcast and good lighting is just hiding. I soooo cannot wait to get this stretched and framed. 

 On another note... (are you surprised?)... I turned 37  27 this past weekend. Momma & Daddy sent me some advice for my birthday that I think is worth sharing...

A Little Guide to Life

BE good to yourself.
There are some things everyone deserves - 
LOVE, respect, time to recharge.

Seek out your DREAMS.
Start small.
Take it as it comes. 
Even a butterfly has to inch along
before getting it's WINGS. 

LISTEN to your heart.
Trust your gut.
If the way seems unclear,

Let your voice be heard. 
You have a story to tell and opinions that count.
AND a difference to make. 

Take every opportunity to learn.
Knowledge IS a gift.
It will take you places.

Hold on to what's important
Let worries go.
No matter how you look at it,
some things just don't make sense.
The way you choose to carry on is what really matters.

And when you make that list of what you want in life,
make another list of what you've got.
Be sure to start with all the things that make you a BEAUTIFUL person.

Most of all, 
You're loved ALWAYS

Soo... I say this directly to all of you lovely people... no matter what path you may be on in this life... head the words of my wise parental unit. 

Go and be magnificent!!

Friday, September 11, 2015

Where did those come from???

Hey, Peeps!

Sorry for the hiatus. Hit another rough patch on the road I have been traveling. Made an unexpected trip to Elvis Town... one half of my parental unit is a stage 4. Extremely exhausting week there.

The girl that I call daughter turns 17 tomorrow. How'd that happen?

Turned my self into a fried turnip changing the brakes on Precious. Darn car is going to turn me gray headed faster than the kinder vermin. LOL She broke down on me in Elvis Town... again. I refuse to let her beat me, though.

Today, I thought of someone lost to me. I shouldn't minimize the impact, for he may have been small in stature but he was big in personality and the world lost a treasure. I knew he was troubled and gave him my cell for any time day or night calls. I'd met his beautiful daughter. We laughed a lot. He called one evening but I was busy and couldn't talk long. He OD'd that night. I couldn't bring myself to attend his funeral. I still have yet to visit his grave. I pretty much did what I do and suppressed the trauma into a small black box on the shelf in an ever expanding library. I want to go. I can't go alone though. It's been 3 yrs now. Call me a coward for not going, but his passing nearly broke me. How'd I miss the signs?

Okay, enough of the heavy stuff. I bet you're wondering where the original question came from...
I was bent over blow drying my hair this morning (don't you?) and noticed that I have started developing old lady knees!!! When did that happen? Is there such a thing as a knee lift? It's not funny, but it kinda is because then in my shock and appall I flipped my hair back over to stand up and hit my head on the bathroom door. I mean, really?!

Well, in all of this random mumbo jumbo I have made some progress. So much so that I am only lacking about 4500 more stitches to complete Starry Night!!! Take a gander...

Some words of advice before I set you free on your own path:
Find the beauty in the everyday monotony. I know it's tough, but if I can do it so can you.
Enjoy the simple things... it's coming up on pumpkin spice season in this hemisphere... fall is grand.
Take the time to grieve... putting it off can suck some of the life right out of you. If you are facing some challenges at this point in time then I am sending you love, light, hugs and prayers... consider it a silent request met.

As for today... Never Forget...

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Van Gogh and Mom Butt

I may have disappeared from the cyber world for a few weeks, but I have most definitely made some progress in the war against Van Gogh...
I've finally made it to the last quarter!! Can I get an AMEN!?!?! So close and yet so far on this one.

I came to a realization the other day:
I have found what I term the mom butt. I turned in the mirror the other day and ka-boom... I had no words other than "oh my holy cow batman!!!" How did that even happen?! The good news... I'm working on putting it back in it's place.
My request for Sainthood was met with less than an exciting stamp of approval. I really did perform 3 miracles. Some of these students are lucky I am here. Anyhoo, when I requested my sainthood be stamped with approval, Yoda responded saying she'd give me 1 wing. (At least it wasn't 1 feather that was offered. HAHA)

I need vacation. Fall semesters always drain my batteries.

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

The Keikis have names!

Everyone already knows that I name my plants. And everyone already knows that I've had my orchid, Calypso, for quite some time. I feared that she would never bounce back from being sunburned in the car because the keikis stopped growing. I resigned myself that is was time to pot the keikis and let Calypso go. Lo and behold, Calypso had a spot of new growth. I think the pitch to my shriek of excitement was high enough that the dogs started barking and the windows cracked. LOL.  Excited, I was.
She still looks rough, but now there's hope she will recover. Especially since the kids have been weened, LOL.

As for the keikis... I almost went old school and named them Laverne and Shirley... hahaha. Upon second thought, I decided that since their mother's name represented a bad@ss... they needed to be named via the same fashion. Say hello to Arwen and Ygritte...
All comfy in their new space.

As for Starry Night: it's coming along quite nicely. The top right corner has been found. YAY! Progress! That's what happens when you spend the holiday weekend stitching it up to a Harry Potter marathon. So close and yet so far.

Still driving Precious without an O2 sensor. I went to three different places last Friday. One was closed. Went to ask a friend for help, but he wasn't at work. So his co-worker said to pull into the bay and he'd help. At that point the Manager said no just as my car was being jacked up. Really? I should've just kept my mouth shut when I was told my friend wasn't there. So what if they were a tire shop... they have a jack and tools, right?! So, the Manager told me to go to a place just down the road. I get there, run in, and the guy tells me they are covered up with work and it would be next week. REALLY!!! Their shop had 3 bays... that were all EMPTY!  Buckets and buckets of profanity started sloshing around in my not-so-ladylike brain at that point, but I was a good girl, said thank you and left. You know, it would take all of a few minutes for a brute of a man to unscrew my O2 sensor. I would have done it but I'm just not strong enough. Grrr. 

It's the stuff life is made of that makes it interesting... failures, triumphs, blessings and @ssholes.

Mini rant over.


Thursday, June 25, 2015

Moose is Life!

What does that even mean?! There's always a variety of scribble scrabble on my desk calendar. On any given day you'll see "Hey Giiiirl!", "What's up?", "Skipper Rules" or various other do-dads and swirly-gigs. But, I have to say "Moose is Life!" is a new one on me.

Ive been not-so-patiently working on Starry Night. I do believe I have almost made it to the other side!

It won't be long before I am chopping all that extra fabric away. YAY! I think I mentioned not being 94 when I put the finished piece away and leave this world in my sleep... however, I am now thinking I may not win the battle over becoming cross eyed. I know, drama at it's best.  :)  At least I am smiling about it.

Speaking of smiling... Precious has proven me wrong once again. I, yes me with very little assistance from my brother, dropped the gas tank and replaced the fuel pump and then fuel filter. When all was said and done I kicked her in the tire and screamed "Who's my b!$ch, now?!?!" Precious purred like a kitten... until she didn't the next morning when she died. I guess it was her way of putting me back in my place, LOL. Five new codes. It's official. I AM THE JOB OF CARS! What did I do? First thing was order an O2 sensor and scream bloody hell. Then, I text my Daddy. (Are you surprised?) I mentioned the issues, the likeness to Job, and then told him I was trying to keep the faith and not order an RPG off the black market. (As if I really would.) Daddy's response? "I'm not worried about you ordering off the black market... b!$ch be taking all your money. Word." It's a good thing he can help me laugh through the invisible tears. In the meantime, I'm trying to figure out how to make millions off my own flugelbinder idea... in a perfect world.

Someone please tell me that you're living the high life on a yacht somewhere. It would be nice to know in order to live vicariously through you.

Keep it real, peeps.

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Day Dreaming and Starry Night

They go hand in hand, right?

As promised, I started back on Starry Night over this past weekend. Decided I better just buckle down to complete the next 40K stitches because I have another big project sitting in the wings. Wink wink. But, here it is so far:

I wanted to get more stitched, but the boy and I helped haul 180 bales of hay on Saturday. Then Sunday I was down to Macon for a conference.

I returned home yesterday to find that Meeko had Houdinied (Is that a real word? If not, pretend it is.) herself out of her cage. This meant that my apt was in shambles as she cleared the end table, dumped Cricket's water bowl and left land mines by the front door and in the bathroom. It would seem that I keep getting roped into babysitting, lol. (The girl is now on a two week trip to Wyoming.) This Yeti certainly does love her Meeko though.

As for day dreaming.... weeeeellllll... if you ladies don't know who Brock O'hurn is.... you need to cyber meet him. I'm not sure about his character/demeanor but he is definitely pretty to look at.
Mr. Man Bun himself...

You're welcome.
You know, it should be completely illegal for a man to have prettier hair than a woman. Totally not fair.

And then I asked myself... is he prettier than the character of Jon Snow??? (Played by Kit Harrington) Oh, the dilemma!

I may be pushing 37 27, but I am definitely not blind to God's creations.

And then... the daydreaming was shattered in an instant when I was called with a notification for an audit... bahaha. Don't worry, I'm not complaining about it, though it does raise my hackles a tad bit. I actually love being audited. I have been in my position for 7 years and not once have there ever been any findings on my work. I think it makes the auditors crazy, lol. This will be the time for my OCD perfectionist flaws to shine like rock stars!

Ok, I'm rambling. My bad.

Peace, Love and Happiness my peeps!

Thursday, June 4, 2015

What it is, Yo?!

Home safe and sound after a debacle of a trip to Elvis Town. My 4 day weekend turned into 10 days. It's not like this workaholic didn't have plenty of vacation, but I did not want to use the time being stranded due to transmission failure and then the mechanic frying my electric board. (As a side note, Scotty needs to be fired because he never did approve my request to be beamed to the beach.) Now... my fuel pump is acting up. Would someone like a free rain cloud? It's been hovering over my head for almost 2 decades. On the brighter side, I've learned to laugh through my tears.

Moving on...

The kids and I did end up having some fun with my parents and grandparents. Grandaddy turned 80 so we had his party. And he totally enjoyed hanging out with my Boy:

Daddy took us to the deck on top of the Pyramid:

The Girl let Meeko play outside. She decided she liked picking up hitch hikers. Have you ever nit picked a ferret? Great times, I tell you. We ended up having to hold her by the scruff so she'd chill out.

I finished another Christmas ornament and started back on Starry Night. Isn't it just too cute?!

AND... chopped about 8 inched off my hair: Can you tell I was extremely excited by the Mona Lisa smile? My shampoo/conditioner bill should be cut in half!

A couple more things before I disappear from cyber space for the day:
1. Someone needs to put a stop to the plethora of coffee consumption studies. They're giving me whiplash! Yesterday the amount of my coffee consumption was healthy for my heart, today it's caused me to have one foot in the grave and another on a banana peel. I just want to scream out "you're killing me, smalls!"
2. Refining your skills for mischief is a must. Not doing so just turns your mischief into extremely bad behavior. Please tell me that you know the difference...
3. Don't be so serious... if you can't laugh at yourself, message me... I'll laugh at you and teach you how. 

All right peeps... keep it golden!

Thursday, May 21, 2015

I mean, really???

Who in their right mind would put "nom, nom, nom" on a pack of tissues? People are not meant to think of their boogies as nom, nom, nom. Someone in the marketing department got this one all wrong.

I did start working on a quick stitch. It's called First Star. I found the pattern in one of my cross stitch magazines. I should be done with it this weekend.
Too cute, right?

Headed to Elvis Town tomorrow. Please pray for my sanity. (What little I have is holding on by half a thread. One little twist and I'm a goner.) Traveling with two teenagers, a dog and a ferret can be slightly tricky. I may just drug them all with Benadryl and wake them up when we get there. I mean, I suppose I could give Cricket Benadryl, I've given her baby Tylenol when her RX was too much for her pain level. It works. And, if I accidentally overdose her at least she's had a good long life, right? I'M NOT BEING SERIOUS!! True I've given Cricket Tylenol, but I wouldn't just give her Benadryl. Remember... never take me serious unless I say I'm being serious... seriously.

That's all I've got.  Off to get more coffee and try to convince my cousin to FedEx me a really juicy green chili cheeseburger... now that's nom, nom, nom!


Thursday, May 14, 2015

41,360 Stitches So Far

Yup, Starry Night is 1/3 of the way complete! I think I'm going to take a break from Van Gogh and stitch something small again. I think I'm going blind from all the black, blue and green. Totally excited that I have made it this far. As Thomas says, "I think I can, I think I can."
Oh my goodness... I just now noticed that I have actually stitched the shadow of a house in the lower right corner. It looks completely different when it is all up in my face. (I can't find my glasses, lol,)

I took a day trip to Bear Paw with some friends. It was AMAZING just sitting on the lake and balcony. Lovely day, just lovely.

Upon my return from Bear Paw, I went to purchase new scissors, after Dottie destroyed my last pair. I must have looked at 15 different pair. The store didn't carry any even similar to the last pair... so irritating. However, it was a no kids weekend for this single girl... who needs food when you have wine, stitching and GoT? (Please don't remind me that I need to get a real life... I'm already attuned to the fact that the edge I'm living on is really sad. HAHA!)

Other than that, same stuff different day.

Wishing you peace, love and a fabulous weekend!

Friday, May 1, 2015

Only Me.

People often wonder why I am selectively social. Sometimes, I just don't like people. Sometimes, I  don't like me. Sometimes, it's because my brain to mouth filter malfunctions and I say ridiculousness.
Last night I suffered from a brain to mouth filter malfunction. I went to a local high school to present a couple of scholarships. I said good evening and called out the wrong school name. to which I showed my utter shock and appall :
(this was me... literally)

I brought my self back from the edge claiming that was bad and begged to not be lynched. The audience laughed when I mentioned something about losing my mind. Thankfully, I presented the two scholarships without blunder. As I said thank you, I received a grand round of applause and hastily exited stage left and straight out the auditorium door. Now the answer to the puzzle remains... were they clapping because my blunder was hilarious or were they just happy to see me leave? Let's pray it was because of being proud of the students who showed great promise and received scholarship funds.

I decided that I needed some retail therapy while driving home. I remembered that I had ran out of my 3866 thread for Starry Night. Hobby Lobby... here I come. I only spent 45 cents on the thread. That was some expensive therapy! haha.

Finally. I'm home and in my comfy clothes. I sit down to stitch. Not. My poor stitching scissors have met their demise. Dottie, the neighbor's dog that I am "babysitting" decided they would make an excellent chew toy. See... the culprit. She better know that I love her.

Other than that, it's Friday! The morning started off rough when I banged my head on the bathroom door (don't ask), I spilled half a bottle of nail polish remover (1st world problem at it's best) and calmed my neighbor as she was crying (her husband is in ICU... this would be Dottie's Mom and Dad).

The afternoon is ending GREAT as I have a banana pudding milkshake in hand, I will head straight for new scissors and a bottle of wine after work, and Starry Night is coming along fabulously! I'm pretty psyched about finishing it before I am ninety. (That just means I will have to pass away after I finish another big project... LOL... ok bad humor.)

 Alright, peeps. Shut down your computer and go do something productive!


Thursday, April 23, 2015

Meeko is a Creeper

McStinky has been staying with me for a bit. I let her out to play in the bathroom while I was in the shower. There I am shampooing my long locks of dark brown and silver, look down and who do I see... Meeko McStinky watching my every move from around the shower curtain. Bahaha. I wish I could have taken a picture, but come on now... that would have been inappropriate. I tell you what, for those creepers and demented blog stalkers out there who need therapy, I'll do you a favor. Stop imagining and just look...
Yup... muffin top and baby belly. Now move on.

I have managed to snap a few amusing photos of Meeko.

Playing in my shoes...

Stealing Cricket's bunny...

Sleeping in my coat sleeve...

Still sleeping... (But this oneis fabulous!)

Trying to get my Cheez-its! No worries, I took the bag out of the box and just let her play with the box.

While sorting through photos, I did find one more of Roscoe P Coltrane that I wanted to share:

He's such a crack head!

Anyways, There was something else I was going to tell you... Oh! The Girl and I missed having a big prom fiasco by the hair on my Granny's chinny chin chin. We found out she was going to prom on Thursday with prom being Saturday. Ugh. Her date brought her by the office Friday night. We went to the shoe store, found nothing, we went to pick up the dress 30 minutes away. She had two dresses that she borrowed, but wanted to wear the white one. We went to pick up The Boy and she tried on the white dress. It was a no go b/c her tata's were too big. So black it was going to be. (Thank goodness we didn't buy white shoes!) So, we go to the mall, find nothing, go to Waffle House and eat like pigs, and then go back to the first shoe store. The Girl starts getting huffy and puffy. She claims she's not going. Now, I've just driven over 45 miles going back and forth so I get a little irritated to say the least and tell her that she's going in a very quiet, you're in big trouble, mom kind of voice with that evil eye. The Girl then claims that she will wear her combat boots with her gown. I THINK NOT! That hit my last nerve, and over something as trivial as boots. So, what do I do? I yelled out in the store that I have just driven all over hell and half of GA and she was not leaving that f-bomb store until she found a pair of shoes. I mean really, we still had to pick up hair, nail and makeup supplies and it was already pushing past 9pm... my bedtime, need I say more. LOL. So, a little old lady stops top talk to me . She says "hell and half of GA, huh?!" I said "Yes, ma'am. I apologize if I have offended you but she's threatening to wear her combat boots with her gown." She pats me on the arm and says "I'm so sorry, dear," and walks away. HAHAHA. Thankfully, at that moment in time, I turned around and there was a pair of shoes in The Girl's size and to her specifications! Hallelujah! I think the little old lady was an Angel. We finally got everything situated and the Girl went to prom and had a blast. I hope she knows how much I truly love her.

On an ending note... Van Gogh is coming along. I'm about half way done with the bottom left corner. Go me!!!

Well... I'm off to finish my 4th cup of coffee for the day. Please pray for my sanity as it has been quite another day. Thank goodness it's Friday Eve!

Thursday, April 16, 2015

The Excitement...

is bubbling over. Who says the office has to be dull and boring on a Thursday afternoon?

I am proud to say that Brynnie has graduated from a Padawan cross stitcher into a full fledged Jedi. Behold... her very first project!!
Isn't Jolly adorable? I can tell the force will be strong with this one.